When We Play Alone, We All Lose: A Leadership Lesson from Building a World
- Lorraine Connell
- 21 hours ago
- 3 min read
I can’t stop thinking about a simulation I recently participated in.
The task sounded simple: build a “world.”
We were given projects to complete, and each one contributed to one of three categories:
Economy
Society
Environment
We had two rounds to play.
At first, it felt like a strategy game. By the end, it felt like a mirror.
Round One: When Individual Success Feels Like Winning
The group was so large we were divided into two “worlds,” each working independently.
On my team, something subtle—but powerful—happened.
We weren’t working against each other…But we also weren’t working together.
Everyone had their own goals.Their own priorities.Their own idea of success.
There were a few voices trying to bring collaboration into the conversation—but time felt limited, and that idea never fully took hold.
So we played individually.
Our economy thrived—massively.
15x stronger than our environment
3x stronger than our society
We had more than enough money, but why was it so hard to have money, healthy environment AND a strong society?
Meanwhile, the other world?
They were successful across all three areas.
Not as dominant in the economy—but balanced, sustainable, and strong.
Our immediate reaction?
“They must have had different rules.”
We assumed the system was rigged.
Round Two: Collaboration Changes Everything
But then we got a second round.
More time.Same rules.Same resources.
This time, something shifted.
We combined efforts.We shared resources.We started asking each other:
What are OUR goals?
What do WE need?
How can we support that?
Instead of chasing individual wins, we aligned around collective success.
And everything changed.
Our environment improved 10x
Our society points doubled
Every individual met their goals
The economy dipped slightly—but remained strong enough to support everything else
For the first time, it didn’t feel like we were competing for resources.
It felt like there was more than enough.
The Truth We Didn’t Want to See
The game wasn’t rigged.
We were.
In round one, we blamed the system.In reality, we were operating from:
scarcity
disconnection
individualism disguised as productivity
We didn’t lose because of the rules.
We lost because we never saw ourselves as part of the same world.
A Hard Reflection on Leadership
I haven’t been able to shake what this represents beyond the game.
Because this isn’t just about a simulation.
It’s about how we lead.
When leaders prioritize only their own success:
the economy may grow
but society fractures
the environment suffers
and collective goals disappear
And here’s the uncomfortable truth:
When we don’t work together, the only thing that truly thrives is wealth accumulation.
That’s it.
Not people.Not connection.Not sustainability.
Just accumulation.
The Power of Finding Your People
There was a moment in round one that stands out to me now.
The people who wanted collaboration weren’t shut down.
They were met with something quieter:
Apathy.
Indifference.
But in round two?
Those same voices came back stronger.
Clearer. More united.
“We have to work together, or no one wins.”
The Leadership Lesson We Can’t Ignore
Leadership isn’t about controlling outcomes.
It’s about shaping how we play the game.
Because:
When we chase individual wins, we create collective loss
When we assume scarcity, we compete unnecessarily
When we collaborate, we unlock abundance
And maybe most importantly:
You are not the only one who wants something better—you just have to find the others who are ready to say it out loud.
Final Reflection
I walked away from that simulation with a leadership lesson I can’t ignore:
Where in our lives are we still playing like it’s round one?
Where we:
focus on ourselves
ignore the bigger system
and blame the “rules” instead of rethinking how we show up
Because the truth is—
I've seen what’s possible in round two.
And once you’ve experienced that kind of leadership…
You can’t unknow it.
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